Bullied! The Jewish Years What do I know?

Bullied!

I was bullied because I was a nerd, with all the attributes that go along with being a geek in the 1960's when kinky hair and coke bottle lenses glasses were definitely not in style. I was picked on, spit on, and had to run away from the boys in the freshman class, because they had "Nair" and were not afraid to use it. I had to hide, because I could not stand the screams from the girls they found. Subsequently, I hid out in a in a so called "bad section," that definitely was not Jewish.

I was bullied because I was a nerd, with all the attributes that go along with being a geek in the ‘1960’s.When kinky hair and coke bottle lenses glasses were definitely not in style. I was picked on, spit on, and had to run away from the boys in the freshman class, because they had “Nair,” and they were not afraid to use it! I had to hide, because I couldn’t stand the screams from the girls they found.

Subsequently, I hid in out in a  so-called “bad section,” that definitely was not Jewish, but I made good friends that day in the black community and went back several times before we moved.

There are different kinds of bullying, and mine turned a bit horrific for a 7th grader. One day I was walking through the park across the street we all used as a short cut, when I ran straight into a bunch of boys. They were 9th graders, and one of them, the ring leader, Barry, was my girlfriend’s brother.

I tried to escape, but by then I was surrounded. I prayed that someone would come down that path, but to no avail. I struggled as they removed all of my clothes and thought it was funny to kick me in the crotch , while I was on the ground, and they kicked me hard, so it hurt. That was a warning if I ever told someone.

As I put my clothes on, I looked up and they were gone. After I was fully dressed, I went home and cried and cried in my pillow.

The humiliation was so hard to bear, as was the violation of my personal space. I did not tell anyone, and stayed in the house for a while, until I realized that they were the ones that were threatened.

Why didn’t I defend myself? If it was my brother, I would have tried to kill them. What’s up with that? I am telling this true story, because I know there are others out there with worse encounters than mine.

I am 62 now, and that was over 40 years ago and times have changed. Imagine it was now. I would see myself all over the internet. I cannot even envision it. It hurts me still to think about it. We learned of a local girl who jumped to her death because of cyber-bullying.

There are all kinds of incidents of bullying. Boys and girls too. WE need to stick close to our children so we can tell if something is wrong, because I know I acted differently after it happened and my parents did not take note of the change.

Ask your children, talk to them. What do you think we can do to stop this. It isn’t an old story and will forever be, so it will always be current news.

6 comments

  1. Being a nerd wasn’t cool back in my day either (I’m 60). I wasn’t nerdy enough to hang out with the real nerds. Nor was I pretty enough to hang out with the jocks (although I did OK in sports and I had my animal moment as a sophomore). Wasn’t enough of a burnout to hang with the hippies. Wasn’t enough of a smart aleck and only moderate in mechanical inclination to hang out with the rowdies.

    Fast forward to 1981….. “Lewis Skolnick” made it cool to be a nerd.

    “Back to the Future” was the epitome of nerd rule. Guess who is subservient? The bully.

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    1. I had it a little different. I was stone ugly. and an “a” student to boot. But my personality was such that I did not care what people thought, by the time I was in Jr. High, I grew a few inches and my personality had a lot of confidence overflowing. If those guys hadn’t done what they did to me, I would have had no reason to talk to God, Therefore, I had confidence at an earlier age than expected, so I was in sports, was a 4.0 student, and let people cheat off my paper. and of course, I ended up smoking pot. So I blossomed in 9th grade, and my whole life changed. Thanx for leaving a reply, I enjoy the pm talk. Deb

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      1. I have a story for u then, true of course, and I felt good afterward. I was picked on in 11th grade, but made it thru w/o a scratch bec my best friend (Terry) was 5’9″ and built like a gorilla. So no one would touch me. I do not know what it was about me that made some people hate me w/o knowing me, but that was 11th grade. When I was a senior, Terry and I went to tech school, she took computers- and since I had all of my credits for college I went into Cosmology. There were 75 girls in the room, most fr two other schools. Again I looked meek and mild and some people liked to pick on me. I went thru most of my senior year hearing “Debbie, I would like to beat u up, as soon as Terry isn’t around.” I told Terry and she said if I didn’t do something ,she would. I told her to stay out of it I would take care of this one particular girl, Pat. Pat would walk by me, and under her breath would call me Jerk**f, and other really nice accolades, Lol! Like I said I was 3/4 of the way thru my senior year, when I hit my limit. She walked by me and I said, Jerk**f, she then slaps me across the face, I then grabbed her by the scruff of her neck, turned her around and broke her nose. I had not one problem after that. I was not what I looked like. Too bad it happened at the end of school. Wished I could have done it in 10th grade! Deb

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      2. What it took for starters in 10th grade was placing in a tournament. I also popped one of the juniors in my vocational ed class in the jaw so that ended mind games. In my junior year it turns out one of the “rowdies” (so-called “tough guys”) and I worked together and he pissed me off, so I popped him. Luckily I didn’t get fired.

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